Thursday, April 7, 2011
Come to the darkside. Artists & their demons.
A friend recently said that making art helps keep the demons quiet for a lil while. I agree, but I also think that it's all part of their plan. The voices stay quiet and let us do our thing and lye in the wait, they want us to miss them, and we do. It's so much easier to take advantage of something if it's already vulnerable and those demons know exactly how to marinate our sensitive egos with all the right questions, concerns and aggrivating obstacles that make us ripe for the picking.
Whether its the demon summoning up the unquenchable vices or the demon beckoning your ego to be selfish, the demon is there, or should I say demons.
Before I continue on, in this case I'm not using demon terminology literally. This isn't about demons or deitys are fighting for your soul, rather I'm commenting on the voices from all parts of the ego. The voices want what they want. They want to sate their desires and flush their sensations. For me, art does keep those demons quiet, but not for long. Sometimes it's; Hey johnny, long day in the studio why dont you fix yerself a drink. Other times its much more vulgar and relentless. They comfort me, they accept me and most of all they love to reward me. We sing together, we SHOUT together, we fight off those that stand in our way or try to prevent us from being happy. Those inner demons are our demons, they serve us and they sometimes even protect us so it's no wonder we keep em around. Mine have been around for a long time but they got their own room in my head when I turned 16. Ever since then they have been louder and more demanding and believe me know how to get what they want. It's hard to seperate those things you do for you and those that you do for your demons, bc they tax everything and the lines become blurred. I'm happy enough to say I've managed to learn how to sate them and still be friends and foolish enough to believe I'm in control, but hey atleast i havent given them names. That's when the real shitshow begins. I sure hope none of you are out there naming these things,. NAMES HAVE POWER! Trust me.
We all struggle against our voices and I'm sure there are as many of you out there that are better then me at handling it as there are those that are worse. I only hope that you have something that buys you time, like I have art, because without it I'd be the naked drunken wildman cussing and shouting and fighting my way through existence, living like the devil may already have my soul.
heheh I'm just kidding theres no such thing as a devil. Unless you want there to be.
\Happy trails sinners.